Cyberpunk 2077 finally launching should have been one of the beacons of hope in 2020, a moment where we could all rejoice at this epic RPG making it to shelves. Instead it seems 2020 has continue to poop on us all. Cyberpunk 2077 is a mess from top to bottom, and while the general consensus seems to be that the actual core game is excellent, it’s buried under so much digital shit that even a pig would look at it and thing, “Nah, I’m not gonna be happy in that much shit.” Even on PC it’s a cavalcade of bugs and glitches, some hilarious and some completely game-breaking. But on console, it’s so much worse, and people playing on the based Xbox One and PS4s are getting the worst of it. Keep in mind that Sony estimates only 20% of their 110-million PS4 users are playing on a Pro. Terrible framerates, crashes, textures not loading in, a raft of bugs and so much more are ruining people’s experiences.
Bugsnax is the kind of game that could only have been summoned forth by someone suffering from an intense fever who then decided to get stark-raving drunk and topped off the entire day with a mushroom trip gone horrifyingly wrong. I can imagine them now, huddled in a corner, ranting and raving. The next day they stagger out of their room and try to explain their hallucinations. “Okay, so, like, there’s these Grumpuses, right, who are like Muppets, all made of felt and fuzz. And they’ve gone to an island called Snaktooth, yeah, and on that island there’s hotdogs with legs and flying pizzas and angry jacket potatoes that ram people, right. They’re called Bugsnax, ‘cos they’re part bug, part snack. But the Grumpus’ eat ’em, and then, like, their body parts change into the food that the Bugsnax was, you know?” Sit down, Jamie. Just sit down, bud, and I’ll get you some water, It’ll be okay. I hope. Maybe I’ll ring an ambulance, just in case, dude.
Having been absurdly lucky enough to stumble into a PS5 pre-order among the absolute chaos, I’ve now had the Playstation 5 for a few weeks and have been playing it every day. So, with lots of thoughts about Sony’s newest, shiniest, biggest console swirling about my head, I present to you my rambling review of the PS5. Is this new generation worth jumping into? Does it have any major problems? Are there actually games to play on it? WHY IS IT SO DAMN BIG!?
The plan was to review Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla, a difficult proposition because OH MY GOD, IT’S HUGE! According to Ubisoft, Valhalla is actually smaller than the bloated Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey, but it doesn’t feel that way. Anyway, along the way I’ve discovered that Valhalla is a bug-ridden game, […]
Okay, so at what point does the next-gen become current-gen? Because, obviously both the new Xbox and new Playstation are out and while you can’t buy them easily they technically are the current-gen now, aren’t they? And the PS4 and the Xbox One are last-gen, surely? And yet…I still find myself using the term “next-gen” when talking about the PS5 and Series X/S. And lots of articles on the web still use the term as well. So that’s my question of the week folks: is it current-gen or next-gen? What are we living in!? I’M SO CONFUSED!
Before getting into the review proper, it’s probably worth establishing exactly what Spider-Man: Miles Morales is, aside from obviously being a video game about a Spider-Man. Even Sony and Insomniac didn’t seem to know exactly what this was when they revealed it, leaving loads of people trying to determine if it was going to be a sequel, a spin-off or an expansion pack. Officially they’ve called it a standalone game, I’d say it’s a standalone-expansion. It acts as a sequel in that it does follow on from the events of 2018’s Marvel’s Spider-Man, but it’s a much smaller experience that focuses on Miles Morales’ journey as he figures out not just how to be Spider-Man, but also how to be his own Spider-Man and not a copy of the original. Arguably, it could have been launched as a chunky add-on for 2018’s Marvel’s Spider-Man. But in the end, I’m glad Miles Morales got his own game, and I’m glad we got a hell of a PS5 launch title out of it.
With Codemasters being bought by Take-Two for a substantial £750-million ( a deal due to the be finalised in Q1 of 2021) it looks like we can expect more annual DiRT, GRID and F1 games since that’s a major part of Take-Two’s business plan. It should provide Codemaster’s with more financial security, but will it possibly lock them into doing nothing more than annualised franchises? Which is what they do now, really, so I guess nothing will change. The point is, DIRT 5 will likely be the last game to come from Codemaster’s without also being under the considerable shadow of Take-Two, so is DIRT 5 a suitable goodbye to Codies in their current form?
Watch Dogs: Legion takes place in a future London where drones cruise through the sky, cars drive themselves and everybody dress like they’ve just walked off the set of a punk rock video. However, a private security company by the name of Albion essentially rules London following a series of devastating bombings that are blamed on DedSec, the same group we’ve been following for the prior two games. As a member of DedSec you know that your hacktivist group has been framed, but by who and why is the mystery that needs solving. Luckily for you, the people of London are ready to rise up, and you can literally play as any single one of them. Previous Watch Dogs have presented the idea of anyone being able to rise up and make a difference, but Legion makes it a reality by making every NPC you meet a potential DedSec operative. So, is Watch Dogs: Legion another by-the-numbers Ubisoft game, or something special?
Somewhere in the middle of all the news about next-gen, COVID, the election in America, lockdowns in the UK and everything else I think I just switched off. I didn’t want to write a Weekend Whammy because I didn’t know what to say. I should talk about a […]
Back during the days of the Playstation 2, the cheerful, charming mascot platformer was all the rage, from Spyro the Dragon to Crash Bandicoot, both of which have gotten remastered or remade. These days the cutesy platformer isn’t as popular as it once was, but every now and then a new one turns up and tickles the ol’ nostalgia balls. This time it’s Pumpkin Jack, a game that feels so much like a classic PS2 platformer that you could tell me it was actually just a remaster and I’d believe you. In fact, it’s so enamoured with evoking the spirit of those old platformers that it even has iffy combat and a naff story, just like them. So, let’s review Pumpkin Jack, the bastard offspring of MediEvil and A Nightmare Before Christmas.