The classic fetch quest is a staple of gaming, typically found in RPGs that want to pad out their length by sending players scurrying back and forth carrying useless tat. In the case of Death Stranding however, the entire game is a seemingly never-ending series of fetch quests. It’s like Kojima only just discovered them, and after completing a few in other games branded them the greatest thing in the history of videogames ever and built an entire new game around them. As Sam Porter Bridges you are a courier, tasked with lugging cargo of all types across a bleak post-apocolyptic world where the majority of people are hunkered down in bunkers. Chiral printing lets them create a lot of what they need, but there’s also a lot of stuff that still needs to be transported the good old fashioned way: on Sam’s back. In this 40+ hour game the majority of your time will be spent going back and forth, delivering parcels. Exactly how something so utterly boring wound up being so utterly absorbing is a mystery.
It’s time for another Weekend Whammy my friends, and this week I’m going to be talking about Death Stranding, Destroy All Humans! and Ubisoft’s implosion. I mean, I will be if I can get my head on straight. With some of the restrictions lifting my youngest niece was able to come around and stay for the night. And for the next night. And the night after that. And then another one, just to be sure. I don’t think I’ll ever be the same again. Man, that kid can talk!
Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh baby, it’s time for another Weekend Whammy, my friends! This week it’s a short one, but I’ll be chatting about Death Stranding, Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey and Medievil. Oh, and there’s a free code for Europa Universalis on Steam. The first one to use it gets the game.
Behold, another weekend has passed and thus, as is the great Lord’s command, it is time for another Weekend Whammy that isn’t actually on the bloody weekend. I’d like to open this week by telling you that my left leg is currently dead because I’ve developed a baffling habit of folding it under my right leg over the past few weeks and for the life of me I can’t stop doing it. I’m doing it without thinking about it and then 30-minutes later I swear loudly because I tried to stand up and instead ended up wobbling around like some cooked spaghetti trying to walk. Why the hell do us humans do weird stuff like this? What is wrong with us?